Insomniacs Anonymous
by supermagicwater
Summary: Karkat becomes a member of Insomniacs Anonymous, meets some new people, and accidentally asks someone out. Each part will have a different character perspective. Human!stuck.
1. Chapter 1 - Karkat (1)

I hated this time of night. Or morning? I couldn't fucking tell. It was dark, so it's night. All that matters was that it was dark, it had been dark for a while, and I was still awake. Every god damn night, I was awake.

Every night I would wander the streets, just trying to get some exercise, hoping the physical effort will tire me out. No such fucking luck. I'd get to bed and somehow be even more alert and awake then I was when I left.

You know what? I felt like a ghost. A fucking ghost watching all the living people pass me on the street. All the smiling, happy people, probably walking home to sleep on their nice, comfy beds, to dream about their nice, comfy lives.

Fuck people. Especially this one guy I saw. Fucking taping his stupid sign on this stupid ass bakery window. The hell was he doing in there anyway? The bakery was closed, dumb ass.

"Hello!" he fucking said, stepping out of the bakery. This guy was radiating so much fucking sunshine, one in the morning was starting to feel like noon.

"Are you here for the meeting tonight? Or...this morning, I guess?"

"Meeting for what?"

"Insomniacs Anonymous. It's for people who have trouble sleeping and want to get at the root of their problems, or for people who just have nothing else to do. We meet every other day at 1:00 am, here in the back room of my grandma's bakery, Betty's Baked Goods."

"I don't really see myself as an insomniac though. I'm more of an..." I tried to think of a another word that fit my problem, but I came up short. "...oh shit, I am an insomniac."

"Come on in then! The first step is acceptance, and you've already got that down. Anyway, we really need more people, and if you don't like it, you don't have to come again."

I followed Sunshine Man (that was such a poor fucking nickname. I am so sorry. Lack of sleep had hindered my ability to come up with good insults) into the darkened bakery. He led me to a dimly lit hallway and through a door.

The room had a lone light bulb hanging in the middle of the room. It looked like a place this man could've murder me, and I should have been afraid of him if it weren't for the fact that death would have allowed me for some much needed sleepy time.

There was baking ingredients along the shelves on the wall, with a circle of chairs in the middle of the room. Two of them were already occupied by some guys. One of them was wearing black and grey polka dot pyjamas, and had white powder on his face.

...Oh my god. The white powder was flour. He had flour on his face. This guy was swiping flour from the shelves and eating it. Holy shit. What a fucking clown.

And then there was this other guy, looking so nonchalant in his...3D glasses. I kid you not. 3D fucking glasses. In the middle of the night. Nowhere near a cinema. In a fucking bakery. Between the dude in pyjamas eating flour and the guy with the pseudo 3D sunglasses, it was like a meeting place for freaks.

Fuck it. There was nothing else I could have been doing at 1 am. I took my chances and sat next to the Back to the Future minion, keeping sure to avoid eye contact with the flour eater.

"I think we'll just wait a bit for the other regulars, and then we can get started." Sunshine Man looked at me and said, "My name is John, by the way. Oh, and there's the people we were waiting for. Welcome guys! Take a seat and let's get this show on the road." A guy rolled in on his wheelchair and sat next to the pyjama wearing creep as a girl sat down beside me.

John took a swig of his coffee mug and sat down in the circle of chairs. "Okay! Welcome everyone! As you can see, we have someone new to our little group, so hopefully you'll be as accepting to him as you want others to be accepting of you. Now, let's do as we did last time and go around the circle, introducing yourself and saying why you are here. We'll start with...you. Our new member."

They were all looking at me. Shiiiiit. "My name is Karkat Van-"

"No last names please. It sort of goes with being anonymous and all."

"Okay. My name is Karkat and I am an...insomniac?" They clapped for me, probably out of pity, and they waited for me to say more. I had to say something that wouldn't make me appear as lame as I felt. "I am an insomniac because I can't sleep." Good fucking job, Karkat, the breakthrough discovery of the day. "I mean, I can't sleep because...I just can't." So fucking deep. A regular fucking philosopher up in this place. They were probably so glad, so fucking thankful, I could impart my wisdom onto them.

"Great start, Karkat. Now, what about the gentleman with the kicking 3D glasses beside you?"

"You know my name already, John."

"Yes, but we've got to stick to some sort of routine Sol- I mean - unnamed individual."

"Fine, alright. My name is Sollux. I am an insomniac because my dead girlfriend visits me in my dreams, and my guilt for her keeps me from sleeping." Holy shit. How could he tell strangers something like that, when all I could say was "I can't sleep because I can't sleep"? I couldn't even tell if he was sad because of his stupid fucking glasses. He sounded sort of accepting of it, which made it even worse. I should have patted his arm or something, just to let him know someone cared. Instead, I sat there, like the unfeeling loser I am.

They continued going around the circle like this fucking bombshell didn't happen. Next was the flour faced pyjama man.

He didn't say anything. He just sat there and smiled. Just fucking smiled with flour caked around his mouth. He stared at John, and just kept on smiling.

So we moved on to the guy beside him.

"Um, hi. I'm Tavros, and I'm an insomniac. I get phantom pains under my knee cap, I guess where my leg was amputated? It's particularly bad when I'm about to sleep, so I, uh, have trouble sleeping."

Last to go was the girl beside me.

"Hey, my name's Vriska and I really don't know why I keep coming here. Like, yeah, I can't sleep, but I feel like I have better things to do with my time. Most of them involving not being here."

"Why are you here then?" asked John. Vriska shrugged and stayed silent.

"Well, anyway, next time we meet, maybe we'll be more comfortable with each other and share a little more about ourselves. What I'm hoping for is to make a community where we can openly share our worries and problems. The weight of them may lift off our shoulders, and we might finally be able to sleep with clear heads. Time's about up, so hopefully I'll being seeing your faces (and maybe some new ones) next time we meet!" John finished speaking as we got up from the chairs and headed toward the door.

I still felt like I should say something to Sollux, so I caught up with him outside of the bakery.

"Hey, um, Sollux?" Fuck. I had no clue of what to say to him. Up close, he was sort of intimidating. Sort of...hot. In an insulting kind of way, of course.

"What's up?" He said, with a noticeable lisp. It was infuriatingly adorable.

"Uh..." I didn't think this far into the conversation. I should have thought this far ahead. "Are you okay? I mean, uh, do you want to hang out or something?"

...I fucking asked him out. I wanted to know how he was, not if he was interested in me. Fuuuuuuuuck.

"Sure."


	2. Chapter 2 - Sollux (1)

I wasn't in the mood to be with anyone that day, but something about this little man – I guess the fact that his face was scrunched up like an angry baby - made me pity him. Oh well. He'd serve as a good distraction.

We stood outside the bakery in an awkward silence. My acquaintance became visibly more frustrated, so hoping it was not towards me, I decided to break the ice.

"What was your name again?"

"Karkat."

"Solid name."

"Thanks."

We stood in silence some more.

"Do you want to like... walk around? Nothing's really open right now, but maybe we could go to the park or something?" Karkat asked. I nodded, and he looked more relaxed.

Karkat talked the entire way. This guy had some resilient pipes, I tell you. I'm not even sure what he was saying most of time. I would think he was talking about a movie, and then he would get really angry at the state of senior citizens. Then he would get angry at himself for getting angry at senior citizens. At least he was entertaining.

We found a bench in the park and sat down. When Karkat took a break from talking, I asked, "So...why did you want to hang out with me? I'm not complaining or anything, you're just the first person I've talked to from Insomniacs Anonymous."

"Fuck, I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing half the fucking time, to be honest. I can...I can leave if you want me too..."

"No, it's fine. I was just curious." I heard a rumble of thunder in the distance. It was probably going to rain soon.

"Do you want to get some coffee?" I asked Karkat.

"Coffee?"

"Uh, yeah. Coffee."

"Coffee!"

"Coffee...?" I wasn't quite sure where our conversation was going, but it was... going. It definitely had a destination in mind.

"Fucking coffee."

We also bonded over the word "coffee".

We're really fucking pitiful.

"So, we're going to get some coffee then?" I asked again, just to make sure I understood our very complex conversation.

"Hell to the fucking yeah we are."

Surprisingly, we found a coffee shop near the park that was open this early in the morning. Karkat said his friend worked there and often gave him discounts, but he'd always pay the rest of what he owed in the tip jar when she wasn't looking. What a good Samaritan this little angry man was.

When we entered, the server perked up when she saw Karkat.

"Hey, Karkat! You want a coffee with one sugar and no milk, right?"

"Yes. And what do you want?" Karkat looked over to me.

"I'd like a coffee with honey. Lots of honey." Karkat gave me a weird look and then paid for our coffees.

"Here you go!" The server placed our coffees on the table, then said, "Have a perfect day, Karkat and friend!" She rolled her "r" on the word perfect, making it sound like she was purring. I'm not going to lie; it was kind of cute.

I picked up the coffees and noticed Karkat's cup had a crude drawing of a cat's face under the letters "KK".

"Hey, KK. You've got a kitty on your cup."

He blushed and became flustered. "I fucking know I have a cat on my cup. It's my... companion kitty. If I didn't want it there it wouldn't be there, alright? There's nothing wrong with cats, okay?" He took a breath, "Also, don't call me KK."

"Whatever...KK."

"Fuck you." We sat down at a table near the window. I took a sip from my coffee.

"So...KK," KK looked slightly miffed at his new nickname but said nothing, "Do you have any hobbies? Or a job? Or anything else you'd like to tell me that will somehow cover up the monotony of small talk?"

"I'm a computer programmer, I guess? I mean, that's my hobby and job. At least, it would be my job if they were hiring anyone with less then ten years experience."

I smiled. "Really? I'm also a programmer. I just finished fixing up a website for this fucking puppet site. Like, for fucking puppets. Or puppets for fucking, I don't know. It was really messed up."

He giggled. A legit giggle bubbled out of his throat. Considering I hadn't heard him laugh yet, a giggle was not what I was expecting. I laughed so hard I knocked over my coffee and spilled it all over the table. KK, looking embarrassed, grabbed some napkins and started to clean up the coffee.

Between spurts of laughter I said, "KK, it's okay, I got this."

"You're right you fucking got this." He threw a dirty napkin at me and it landed on my head like a little soiled hat as his hand knocked over his coffee in the process. We both started laughing and didn't stop until we cleaned up our mess and left the coffee shop.

When we went outside, the sun was rising. Blue storm clouds were highlighted in the red dawn. It was awesome.

KK looked up at the sky. "It looks like rain," he said, using his keen sense of deduction.

"We should find some place to stay before it rains. My apartment's pretty close, I think...You can come if you like." KK nodded and I led him to my apartment building.

When we got there, I unlocked my apartment door and ushered him inside. "Welcome to my home. There's a couch there,a desk there, a computer, and a kitchen. Pretty crazy, huh? I bet you didn't think a guy like me would have a kitchen AND a couch, so hopefully I didn't fuck with too many of your expectations."

"Don't forget the television and the table. I wouldn't have pegged you for a table kind of guy."

"Don't worry, KK. We all make mistakes." I looked around the room, trying to figure out what we could do. "I wasn't planning on company today, so I don't know what we could do to pass the time..."

"We could watch this movie." KK pulled the movie _Hitch_ out from his pocket.

"...Are you carrying that movie around, waiting for any opportunity to pull it out?"

"No... I had borrowed it from a friend and I was going to give it back today. I just forgot to-"

"It's such an awful movie too. Out of all the movies to have on you-"

"Shut up," He laughed as I put the movie into my DVD player. While watching _Hitch,_ it started to rain harder outside. I had to keep increasing the volume of the television because of the rain drumming against the window, not that we were missing any groundbreaking dialogue. The only exception was Will Smith teaching Kevin James to dance. Hilarity. KK was even muttering the scene's dialogue under his breath. He had to hold back his dance moves though (I saw him twitching beside me. Fucking adorable, that little, twitching ass on the couch).

When the movie was over I said, "I need that hour and twenty minutes back, KK. You owe me." My cellphone began to ring, and recognizing the ring-tone that belonged to my friend ("Whale Sounds of the Ocean"), I answered it.

"Hey, Fef! Oh, you...uh...Yes...Yes...okay." I hung up the phone.

I felt numb.

"You okay, Sollux?" Karkat asked. There was a flash and a loud crack of thunder, then the power went out. For a few moments, we sat silent in the dark.

"I'm..." I cleared my throat, got off the couch and walked to the kitchen. "Do you want something to drink?" I opened the fridge. "Water? Juice? Some... bottles of mead? I should probably get some candles too..."

"Mead? I've never had mead, but I'll try it." I poured KK and myself a glass of mead and grabbed matches and a bee shaped candle from the kitchen drawer. I walked to KK on the couch, and lit the candle on the table.

"A bee candle? That's fucking adorable Sollux."

I said, "You know you're jealous of it, KK," a bit quieter then I wanted. My voice was failing me, so I took a large swallow of the mead.

With the power off, there wasn't much for us to do except drink our mead in the flickering light of the bee candle. We sat in the shadow of a growing silence, having exhausted our well of small talk topics. We drank to keep busy.

It wasn't until the alcohol kicked in that we started talking again.

"Why did...why did you think watching _Hitch _on a date was a good idea?" I asked.

"I don't know, man. Actually, I do know. _Hitch _is a fucking masterpiece. Anything Will Smith touches is...is legendary. It's even...mythandary...is that a word? Mythdary...Mythenary... I'm pretty sure it is. Will Smith probably invented it at some point. You can quote me on –wait, this was a date? You actually thought this was a date? I thought it was only I, Karkat, who...who thought it was a date."

"I know what being asked out sounds like. It sounds like...whatever you did...that time...you did it...it was done. So done."

"What do you know about being asked out? You're such a nerd, with your nerdy-ass 3D glasses, and your fucking...fucking other nerdy things-"

"I did have a girlfriend, you know," I smiled, trying to shake off the sad, familiar sinking feeling, but there was no use. I was going to drown in it. There was nothing I could do. "But she's dead. Aradia's dead, and now Feferi's in the hospital," I snorted. "Look at your fucking life, Sollux. Drinking in the dark with some fucking guy, while your whole fucking life burns around you."

KK took a couple deep breaths, trying to find the right words to say, probably fed up with my bullshit.

Then he said, "It'll be okay," He patted my arm, "Everything will be okay."

He moved close to me. He smelled like alcohol, and like... sunscreen? I think it was sunscreen, because it reminded me of the beach, and I distinctly remembered how comforting that scent was. I moved my face closer to his to get a better sense of the smell...

...and then I kissed him. I'm not sure why. Maybe his half-assed reassurance was just what I needed to hear. Maybe it was because of my drunkenness or my desperate need for any sort of comfort. He didn't stop me. He was surprised, but he didn't pull away.

I pulled him closer, wanting to see how far we could go, to test how much someone could actually want me and this shitstorm I had become. My hands crawled under his shirt as his fingers tickled under mine. I saved him the trouble of pulling off my shirt as I pulled it off myself, and he did the same. I fixed my gaze on my bedroom door, expecting his eyes to follow mine, until I made the genius realization that he could not see my eyes through my glasses. I made a bigger fool of myself by pointing and jerking my head towards the bedroom.

He nodded. The light from the tiny flame stretched our shadows into creeping monsters as I led him into the darkness of my bedroom.


End file.
